Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I promise I'm not a meth head

I was carded today. I was carded and denied so my younger sister had to make the purchase.

Nope, I wasn't buying booze. I was trying to buy Claritin D.

It's always somewhat entertaining to have my drivers license recorded, sign multiple forms and then fork over thirty bucks for two weeks worth of pills that may or may not make my life bearable depending on what time of year it is, or if it's rained (or not), which way the winds from Asia are blowing, and if any of my friends have adopted dogs. But, not today. Nope, I hit my federal limit. Not of campaign contributions, but of pseudophedrines.

Here's the thing. I've needed an antihistamine with a decongestant pretty much every day of my life. Then I married someone who also learned the wonders of allergy meds. Now, I have one of those cafeteria plans (no, not for a dining hall card) but a "we take money out of your check before they tax it so you can pay for allergy meds, copays and band aids at a discount - so long as you remember to show us the receipts" card. So, that means that I buy Claritin for both of us.

According to the federal government, having a family problem with allergies isn't okay. Buying enough decongestants for two people means you probably live in a trailer that is about to blow up, cause you failed high school chemistry. Oh and did you know that the fight against meth was the same fight as the one against the terrorists? Yep, attached to the PATRIOT act. So, yes my husband can start buying our decongestants, but if you happen to have a teenager with allergy problems you're both screwed, cause minors can't buy an OTC decongenstant for themselves.

So, how about this? I promise not to make illegal substances. I only want to use a controlled substance to control my sinuses. Because achy face ain't the same as meth face:

I promise.

1 comment:

  1. dammit

    why do meth heads have to ruin EVERYTHING...

    ReplyDelete

be nice.

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