If you've got time to complete twelve tests, or moons (groan), that push your Twilight knowledge - or in my case, Googling ability - to the test, than you too can be surrounded by the stalker-y protectionist steel of Edward Volvo. No, really.
This is only partially true, because while I loved Buffy, watch True Blood and have read all the Twilight books (though before the first was a bestseller - thank you, very much), I draw the line at The Vampire Chronicles.
For a while I blamed my like of vampires on reading Interview with the Vampire at fourteen, but my stifled squeal of delight as I scrolled down the chart above was not the appearance of Lestat. Nope. It was Bunnicula.
That's right the celery sucking bunny. *You can see a larger version in all its gory glory at I09.
The main characters of the Twilight series are being made into Barbies. Not totally surprising, but I have a couple of questions:
1. Does the Bella Barbie have perpetual high heel feet in those sneakers?
2. Does the Edward Barbie sparkle?
3. Why does the "Assortment Case" come with two Edwards?
The only appropriate answers to questions 1 and 2 should be "No" and "Yes."
As for question 3, I'm not quite sure I have an answer to that one. Either Mattel figured out the basic Ken doll frame flaw of his head and legs popping off for no reason is irreparable (No seriously. Ask anyone.) Or, Mattel assumes that the set will be bought by mothers (or gay uncles/fathers) and given to a daughter, only to quickly steal Edward 2 away, because they simply cannot help themselves. Frankly, I don't really see the draw and think Cedric Diggory Robert Pattinson was completely miscast, as made evident by the striking similarity Mattel achieved with his smashed in nose and eerily high cheekbones.
Let's hope it is option number 1 (read: boyfriends are replaceable). Because otherwise, Mattel has succeeded in completely ignoring any agency young women readers could have found in Bella, since they believe that consumers are far more interested in her boyfriend than her.
And really, (is this really a spoiler alert?) there should be two versions of Bella. But then again, it does look like Mattel was content with just closing the mouth of generic Barbie to cast Bella, so physical changes won't matter so much.
What was that? You don't think I'm really that much of a nerd because I like buying school supplies? Ha, ha! Have I forgotten to tell you about my love of all things vampire? It's true. I blame it on a pubescence that coincided with the paperback release of Interview with the Vampire. Oh, and because Joss Whedon is awesome.
To prove my point, I sneakily watched part of this video at work, and then made my husband watch it with me again last night, just so I could see it on his shiny macbook without buffering interruptions:
I admit it. I love Twilight. Yes, yes, it has some problems which I'll get in to later (that post is a doozy) but VAMPIRES! Four books of 600+ pages of VAMPIRES! Okay, okay, the movie wasn't so great. None of them were really pretty enough to be vampires, and the grey/blue wash made me feel cold the whole time I watched it.
Which is why this video so freaking fantastic, because while I have a soft spot for Bella, my heart (and feminist principles) belong to Buffy. Though, I have to agree with Amanda at The Sexist, Buffy did make some questionable choices in dudes.
What was that about vampires?
