To Whom Much Is Given, Much Is Required

I was in the same room with Ted Kennedy twice.

During the summer of 2000, I was an intern for the Hon. Juanita Millender-McDonald in Washington, DC. As a member of the House, her office was in the Cannon House Office Building, a building which induced excited taking-part-in-democracy-living-within-history chills every time I entered it. The office held four interns (including myself), a receptionist, scheduler, three legislative assistants, a legislative director, a chief-of-staff, and the Member herself. All of these desks were crammed into two rooms about the size of my dorm room at American University, except for the Member, who had an office to herself. I thought the cramped quarters were kind of exciting - Democracy at work, and all.

The house didn't use Congressional Pages for much (at least our office didn't). It was nice to leave the office and explore the halls of Congress and the catacombs beneath it, so whenever something needed to be delivered somewhere the interns would volunteer. One day, our LD asked myself and another intern to deliver a piece of legislation to Kennedy's office since it was about to be considered before the Senate. So, we took the elevator to the basement, walked through the catacombs past 19 year-olds with blazers and loafers that cost more than our tuition and very serious people with wires in their ears, took the tiny subway (only the Senate got one) and then went up to Kennedy's office.

When we entered we tried not to be dumbfounded. There, in all its Federalist glory, was a giant expansive office filled with strong jawed east coasters. And lo and behold, there he was. He came out of his office, said hello to us (besides the looks on our faces, our orange INTERN badges were blazing around our necks), and continued into the hall with a gaggle of suits and pearls.

The second time was when I attended a health care briefing. Unfortunately I can't remember exactly what the topic was (I attended A LOT of them) but, Ted Kennedy was there. As he spoke his face became so red that it almost matched the velvet curtains behind him. Sure, this is a family that knows how to enjoy a good cocktail, but it was also because he was so animated about the subject. For a nineteen year-old who had just spent a summer being disillusioned by the players in the "democratic process," it was refreshing.

I am not one to give in to moving eulogies about public figures while denying that they are people - often deeply flawed people. Which is why I was really glad to read Melissa's post:

The terrible bargain we all seem to have made with Teddy is that we overlooked the occasions when he invoked his privilege as a powerful and well-connected man from a prominent family, because of the career he made using that same privilege to try to make the world a better place for the people dealt a different lot.

It could not have been easy to be the only living member of a legacy that everyone expected to change the country, if not the world. But, in many ways he did not rest on the family's laurels. Jezebel put together a list of his legislative accomplishments and it is impressive. Amplify also has the text of Kennedy's speech to the Senate in 1993 on the Freedom of Access to Clinic Entrances Act which, sadly, continues to ring true.

So while I won't forget the flaws the public knew about, I am also thankful for work he did.

Go Army! ...Oh, Veterans? Eh, Good Enough

The 2010 United States defense budget is officially $533.7 billion, but has been estimated to be closer to $780 billion. The Department of Veterans Affairs budget is about $56 billion. That means that we spend 10 times as much to fight wars as we do to take care of the people who fought them.

Granted, weaponry is pretty damn expensive. So is getting soldiers to the two fronts we are currently fighting on (and the many other places were are present) and making sure that all 1.5 million active duty personnel and over 800,000 reservists have the resources they need - though the extent to which we do that appropriately is questionable. But, according the VA we also have 25 million living veterans, and a full 1/4 of the US population is eligible for benefits.

I am by no means an expert on military affairs, but as they say, money talks. And sometimes it speaks directly to you through advertising. Which is why when ads for a mental health hot line for veterans started showing up on every public transit system in the area, I took notice. Unfortunately, the initial relief I felt in knowing that there was a concerted effort being undertaken to address veteran's mental health was quickly overcome by incredulousness over the awful design.

If you look closely you'll notice that the proud American flag in the background looks like it was copy and pasted from the internet and then blown up, the outline of the soldier has some serious anatomical problems, and the god-awful yellow text is incredibly hard to read.

It turns out, that the grainy flag isn't just a dpi problem. Nope, the VA must have thought the grainy Stars and Stripes was "arty" because the graininess is the same on this ad that is four-times larger:

But, does design really matter? Yes, it does. While it is great that a concerted effort is being made to address the needs of veterans' mental health, these slipshod ads illustrate that while we have been forced to address the issue, it does not necessitate the same attention given to recruiting the soldiers who will eventually need these services.

The active military has moved past the print campaigns of yore into snazzy television commercials and flash-laden websites (granted the commercials now have softer, kinder feel). In fact, every branch of the military has a separate recruiting website.

The VA, however, only has one. And it looks like this:

It would be a fine website, if it were 1999. This is the Army one, where you can watch videos, play games and even have a virtual sergeant show you around:

Thankfully, there are many private citizens working with government agencies in an attempt to fill the gap and address veterans' needs. If you or anyone you know needs support, visit The National Resource Directory's (nicely designed) site.

Thanks for the (Do Wah) Diddies

Last night we were driving home listening to NPR (no, we don't own a Volvo or a Subaru) and found out that songwriter Ellie Greenwich had died.

I always hate it when you don't know how amazing someone is until they have passed. This is true for Greenwich because for better or worse, her catchy fun songs were what helped create the pop star state of music. The woman could write. Hot damn could she write, but most of us never knew her name. I am, however, grateful for her contribution to music. Not only are the songs catchy, but most of them are written in my alto range, which means I can sing my heart out to them, like my husband and I did in the car (and into the house) last night.

Sure, most of them were about boys (and all the heteronormative trappings therein), but she seemed to have some pretty smart thoughts on that:

I think, no matter how much of a feminist one claims to be…Lord knows, if you go by my songs, and the way my personal life has gone, you'd say, "Oh my, this lady was dreaming." It didn't exactly happen the way I was writing it. However, I would have liked it to have gone that way. I am a very firm believer in equality, women and men: if you can do the job, by all means go ahead and do it. But I still feel it would be nice if that romance can be there, birds could sing if you fell in love, and you could hear violins. I think that would be really terrific.

One of them was also used for one of my favorite movies ever. So with out further ado:

Old Navy: Jeans for Every Stereotype!

Okay, forget the creepy "modelquins" commercials for a second. Old Navy has managed to once again be condescending to its customers. They have added a new style to their ridiculously named women's jeans that neatly packages their women customers into brightly colored, cotton, female stereotypes.

Previously, you could be slutty (the Flirt), a doormat (the Sweetheart), or a bitch (the Diva). Now you can be The Dreamer:


In other words, you're fat and you better push those curves into the appropriate shape.

Cause if you don't, you won't have a boyfriend to steal jeans from when you would rather not be a slutty, doormat, bitch.

Zine Fest: Lessons in DIY and Gender

On the tail end of Generation X, I was just a little too young, and grew up in a town just a little to far from an urban center to take part in the riot grrrl zine hey day of my generation. Luckily, I got to learn about them in college, since Women's Studies loves a good DIY subculture. That meant that when I started learning about the larger punk rock scene through my husband, zines weren't a total mystery (You mean, you used to learn about new music through little stapled photocopies and had to actually write to someone to get cassette tapes through mail order? Whoa...).

Which is why I was at San Francisco Zine Fest this weekend. My husband is a rather good artist and all around creative type, and I think other people should get to find out just how awesome he is - you can do that here - so I helped him schlep and sell his zines and paintings and also helped out at the info table. I like helping.

Since the fest was in Golden Gate Park, we got a lot of foot traffic, which was great, not only because it meant we had over 1,200 people attend on Saturday alone, but it was my job to explain to folks just what the heck was going on. A lot of my interactions began with people in khakis asking me "What is z-eye-n fest?" So, I gave them a brief definition of zines and the ethos of DIY culture - it was kind of awesome.

All in all, the weekend was pretty darn awesome. We sold almost all of my husbands paintings (including all of the ones he painted while we were there), a bunch of his zines, supported other creators and traded for some pretty awesome stuff.

The most (sadly) shocking thing I noticed was that everyone there was really nice. There were a few strong personalities to negotiate, since not everyone let down their defenses, and as in any subculture there are "celebrities" that like to think of themselves as such. But, in reality, we are all still our self-conscious junior high selves and are excited when people think we are cool, fun or talented.

One of these talented people was Joey Alison Sayers. Joey creates a weekly comic, ridiculously cute paintings, hilarious t-shirts, and comic books. One of them, Just So You Know #1, chronicles her journey coming out as a transexual and her transition to living her life as woman. I think it is an amazingly moving and funny (yes, funny!) story, so you should go spend six bucks and buy it.

I read it while I was at the fest and one of the points she made was really driven home. In one of the chapters, she relates an experience at a zine or indie festival in which two (I'm assuming) guys come and talk about how they find her comics awesome. When they go to buy some they address the dude standing next to her who is selling other stuff. After correcting them, they get confused and walk away.

As I was reading this very page in Joey's comic, my husband was exploring the festival and trading for stuff (he traded Joey one of his paintings for her zine, since he is a total fanboy) so I was holding down the fort. Said fort was adorned with a GIANT yellow structure with a HUGE sign that said "TALL GUY."

I am neither of those things. Okay, maybe at 5'9" I'm kind of tall, but I very obviously read "gal" to most folks. However, more than once I explained to people that I was not the creator of the zines and paintings, it was that dude across the hall, head and shoulders above most other people in the bright orange shirt.

But, here is the thing. Because I am cisgendered it is totally okay with people for me to play with my identity. To quote Joey's comic (which you will see cause you are gonna buy it), "That's weird, right?"

Run Like a Girl

I'm hesitant to talk about South African runner (and now gold medal winner) Caster Semenya at all because she has already had so many people talk about her without her consent, but I have all of 10 readers anyway, and there is something that I keep coming back to.

The idea that we "can tell" what gender someone is by looking at them is flawed on many fronts. What we call "gender" in these discussions is really sex, what kind of reproductive organs one has, and even though there are multiple medically defined sexes, as a society we are only comfortable with two.

The characteristics that we define as attached to the male gender - narrow hips and broad shoulders - are the same traits that we define as beautiful when it comes to the ultimate in defined femininity: fashion models.

The difference here is that someone happens to have narrow hips, broad shoulders and very developed muscles. The muscles that make it necessary for her to do what brought her to the international stage to begin with - to run fast. We can prop you up as the ideal so long as you have no muscle tone. So long as you are not powerful.

If however, you have narrow hips, broad shoulders, rockin' abs and shoulder muscles, are tall, and you win, then we do not trust who you say you are:

"It would seem it is acceptable for masculine-looking women to compete as long as they lose," the paper said. "When they win they must have a 'gender test'."

This is all to say, that even if the invasive tests that she is enduring declare that she does not fit into our definition of "female," the International Association of Athletics Federations will not consider her win the product of cheating.

So, all that may come of this is a an 18-year old woman is being publicly humiliated for doing what she does well. She has been robbed of the excitement and joy she should have felt from winning the Gold Medal at the World Championships:

She said she did not want to go on the podium, but I told her she must. She is not rejoicing. She [didn't] want the medal. She told me: 'No one ever said I was not a girl, but here [in Berlin] I am not. I am not a boy. Why did you bring me here? You should have left me in my village at home'.

The only thing I can hope is that the experts that have been called to explain the many different ways that people can exist without falling into the two "norms" will broaden our understanding of our own limitations to our understanding and acceptance of people.

I also hope that Caster Semenya continues to run and win and leave everyone in the dust.

Now That's Absorbant!

I've got a question:



Is it just me, or are we supposed to think that the magician's assistant is wearing a bathing suit and cap made out of maxi pads?

If we are, that is pretty awesome - I mean who hasn't known someone (or been the person) who incorporated some sort of feminine hygiene product into a costume, or was the costume.

Not so awesome was their decision to give the magician dark red hair (ew).

Pitt: Thanks, But No F-ing Thanks

Evidently, the misogynist, creepy, a-hole responsible for the Pennsylvania fitness club shooting didn't have any friends, not just women. He left his entire estate ($225,000 worth) to the University of Pittsburgh.

Rightly so, the school declined the bequest:

"The university community continues to grieve about the tragic loss of lives. And we believe that any available funds should benefit Mr. Sodini's victims and members of their families. Our thoughts and prayers remain with them. We at Pitt will do what we can to assist them in receiving any funds that have been bequeathed to Pitt."

Is it just me, or does anyone else think it would have been kind of awesome for the school to accept the money and give it all to the Women's Studies Department?

A little final "fuck you" might have been nice.

Pwned!1! - Barney Frank Refuses to Engage the Crazies

Its about damn time. We need to see more members of Congress calling this out for what it is. It is not a conversation. It is not free speech. It should not be engaged.



Crazy: Why do you continue to support a Nazi policy, as Obama has expressly supported this policy, why are you supporting it?

Barney Frank: When you ask me that question, I am gonna revert to my ethnic heritage, and answer your question with a question. On what planet do you spend most of your time?...You want me to answer the question? As you stand there with a picture of the president defaced to look like Hitler, and compare the effort to increase health care to the Nazis, my answer to you is as I said before, it is a tribute to the 1st Amendment that this kind of vile, contemptible nonsense is so freely propagated. Ma’am, trying to have a conversation with you would be like trying to argue with a dining room table - I have no interest in doing it.

Thanks to Pandagon for the transcript.

Twilight Barbie

The main characters of the Twilight series are being made into Barbies. Not totally surprising, but I have a couple of questions:

1. Does the Bella Barbie have perpetual high heel feet in those sneakers?

2. Does the Edward Barbie sparkle?

3. Why does the "Assortment Case" come with two Edwards?

The only appropriate answers to questions 1 and 2 should be "No" and "Yes."


As for question 3, I'm not quite sure I have an answer to that one. Either Mattel figured out the basic Ken doll frame flaw of his head and legs popping off for no reason is irreparable (No seriously. Ask anyone.) Or, Mattel assumes that the set will be bought by mothers (or gay uncles/fathers) and given to a daughter, only to quickly steal Edward 2 away, because they simply cannot help themselves. Frankly, I don't really see the draw and think Cedric Diggory Robert Pattinson was completely miscast, as made evident by the striking similarity Mattel achieved with his smashed in nose and eerily high cheekbones.

Let's hope it is option number 1 (read: boyfriends are replaceable). Because otherwise, Mattel has succeeded in completely ignoring any agency young women readers could have found in Bella, since they believe that consumers are far more interested in her boyfriend than her.

And really, (is this really a spoiler alert?) there should be two versions of Bella. But then again, it does look like Mattel was content with just closing the mouth of generic Barbie to cast Bella, so physical changes won't matter so much.

My Name Might Just Cause the End of Civilization as We Know It

Evidently 70% of American's think I am a bad wife and 50% think the government should put me in line.

No, really. My most recent post for Mother Jones is about a national study on family and gender issues, the results of which shocked even the researchers.

Frankly, I agree with Jessica at Feministing who originally linked to the article. I think choosing one's name is a personal decision and marriage may or may not be the catalyst for why someone chooses to change it. There might be many reasons a woman chooses to drop the last name she was born with. And people change their name all the time for other reasons. Call yourself Princess Sparklebutt - if that is how you identify, more power to 'ya.

In my case, I am the daughter of a feminist who decided to keep her last name and adopt my dad's. She then passed down the convention to both my sister and I. I think its great. My middle name is pretty damn interesting and unique (at least in this country). So when it came to what I was going to do, it wasn't necessarily an either/or option for me. I didn't necessarily want to adopt my husband's last name, but in the end the decision was pretty easy.

We were sitting on the couch one day before the wedding - not actually talking about anything having to do with the wedding (for once), when he said:

You're not going to change your name are you?

Turns out, in his view, the person he fell in love with was the person I was then, name and all, and that is who he wanted to marry - and that, is one of the many reasons I wanted to marry him.

We toyed around with other options: making a new combo one, or both of us adopting my middle name. But, we eventually decided (after all of ten minutes) to stick with the names were already had. It might just be because I'm lazy, but it seems like that is the easiest decision. Correcting well meaning in-laws and friends a few times is much easier than having to make sure my last name is changed on every sort of official documentation, work correspondence, and online account.

And guess what? The world has not come to an end.

The Sex & Gender Beat

I have a new post up at Mother Jones and it is once again filed under "Sex & Gender." As they say, write what you know.

But it is also part of the continued marketing fails. It is nice of companies to help me decide what NOT to buy.

Seriously, make something just for the ladies and you are probably gonna piss us off.

Hollaback Update

A little while ago, I linked to a post I wrote over at Mother Jones on how to respond to catcallers. Today, Deeply Problematic (one of my new favorite blogs) has a piece on catcalling and "partner privilege."

Its a smart post about the many different privileges she has that make it easier to simply walk down the street. I am privileged in many of the same ways that she is: I am white, heterosexual and not just partnered, but married. I have far fewer catcalls to put up with on a daily basis, not only because I am often with my husband, but because when we are not together I have a giant symbol of my socially-sanctioned relationship on my left hand.

Now, the only time I am the recipient of these utterances is when I am with one or more women. Strangely, even if my husband or another man is with us, if the ratio of women to men is high, we will still hear them (I blame Mystery).

A case in point, was this weekend when a few of my friends and I went out dancing. The club we like to frequent is not a bastion of heteronormativity like other douchey places. In fact, on this night in question there was all kinds of partnering going on. But, the jackasses do seem to be everywhere so you have to stay on your toes.

The first time I went to said club, I came home with sore arms and shoulders. No, not from rockin' out, but from checking (with the help of a friend) all the dudes who thought my friends were there solely for them to grind their crotch into uninvited.

Since then, my husband has come out dancing with us because we like dancing together, especially to 1980's synth pop, 1970's metal, and current hip hop all smashed together (awwww). While we joke that he is our own personal security detail, my arms haven't been tired every night he has gone, because far fewer douches think it appropriate to assault - yes, assault - someone who has a friend that they think could kick their ass (read: male).

All this is to say, it made me sad when we were talking about our most recent dancecapades with a friend who had only gone with us the first time, sans my husband, and was one of the targets of dancefloor douchebaggery. She wanted to go again, but was concerned about feeling safe on the dancefloor, so another friend assured her that it was different when my husband or another man was there.

Sadly, this is true. It is true, even though the friend that offered assurances can probably benchpress more than any hipster jackass and can certainly deliver a roundhouse kick to the face. It is true, even though we live in a bubble of progressiveness and frequent clubs whose patrons come from diverse identities and sexualities. And it is true, that even though I have a Master's degree in dismantling the patriarchy and have trained pre-teen and college girls in personal safety, a night out dancing will be more fun with a male chaperone.

Sit Down and Shut Up

With the end of the Bush administration, I had really hoped the days of just spouting outright lies and nonsensical streams of consciousness were over. I was wrong. The news about mobs for hire at health care Town Halls is everywhere now, but not surprisingly, Rachel Maddow has a really good run down of just what exactly is going on:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

The 2000 election was the first presidential election I was able eligible to vote in. I was in college, and by the time my classes were done for the day, the election had already been called, so I dejectedly cast my ballot that would never be counted.

Then, in the 2004 campaign, I worked 17 hour days, seven days a week, for six months hoping that this time we would have an election decided by an informed electorate who had their ballots counted. Again, we did not. And again, it seemed no one really did anything about it.

But, to the point: I thought I was an informed citizen, I worked in electoral politics and in the progressive media, and yet, I never once heard about the mobs for hire that had stopped the Florida recount.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Make sure you watch the section where she identifies every single person in the "mob" as a Republican staffer. Strangely it makes me feel a little better to know that people didn't do that because they were idiots, but because they were paid to be idiotic.

It really is about time that we stop letting this crap slide. It is time that we started teaching people how to think rationally, and not allow for this kind of behavior. Not only is it ignorant, it is threatening to the people in attendance and members of Congress. It is time we take people like Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh an Bill O'Reilly off the air once and for all.

A Crime Against Women

When an awful crime, like the recent shootings in Pennsylvania, occurs I am not one to obsess over coverage. I usually wait for the initial media blitz to pass and then find out more information a day or two later.

So, it was not until I saw this post at Shakesville that I realized that the fitness center shooting was not just a random act of crazed violence, it was a gender-based hate crime.

Even if I had been paying attention to the headlines, I would not have known that it was specifically women that were targeted. Yesterday, all of the headlines were in the similar vein of "Four Dead in Fitness Club Shooting." In fact, when I specifically Googled "women killed in Pennsylvania shooting" I only had two results on the first page that mentioned women in the headline - from Canada and Australia.

But, all one had to do was to read any article to realize that the shooter was the only man that was killed or injured. Three women are dead and nine are injured, but it seemed almost impossible for reports to underscore that this was a gender-based crime, even as they quoted the killer's hate-filled blog. As a commenter at Shakesville noted:

I also noticed that the opening paragraph lists the women as "people", then later mentions that they were all women. It does have the disorienting effect of erasing the misogyny of the killer, doesn't it?

And she is right. Headlines make a difference. They are how we frame events and decipher the onslaught of information surrounding them. Which is why I was relieved to see that just as I started putting two and two together so did all of the smart feminist bloggers.

This morning, this post at Feministing also pointed out that this is not the only gender-based shooting in recent years. And as Jessica pointed out, very few people connected the misogynist dots then, as well.

It is important to note that this is not a new phenomenon. A similar hate-crime was committed in Canada in 1989 at the Ecole Polytechnique - in that case, the shooter was convinced women were stealing his job, in this one they were denying him dates. Which is why I was relieved to read the article Jessica pointed to in The Christian Science Monitor.

Not only does the article identify this horrific act as gender-based violence, it provides a context and history of misogyny:

Misogyny has been around since almost as long as men and women have. The first poem written in Greek that still exists is called "Woman." Its author is anonymous, and it amounts to a harangue against the female sex.

While the gender-equality movement has made strides in the past century when it comes to some of the more blatant forms of societal misogyny, such as banning women from academic and professional settings, misogyny persists in American and other cultures around the world, according to historians.

"This killer fits into a long pattern of males who harbor hatred towards all women, the image of 'woman,' and towards individual real women, and who take out their frustration on a female scapegoat," says David Gilmore, an anthropology professor at Stony Brook University in New York and author of "Misogyny: the Male Malady."

Thankfully, the headlines have changed today. Hopefully they mainstream media will begin to connect the dots between this and other gender-based crimes, as well. One can dream at least.

Lets Talk About Sex, Baby

Yep, in one post I managed to discuss withdrawal, semen and sex without a rubber on an award-winning website.

But, as part of the generation who was educated about sex after the outbreak of AIDS and before the insanity of abstinence-only sex-ed, all this talk of unprotected sex makes me nervous. Particularly, because of the existence of abstinence-only "educators" that will use any excuse to rail about the effectiveness of condoms.

I'm also not a big fan of evolutionary psychology, and using science to argue that there is only one right way to have sex.

(that's right...not one, but two, references to mid-90's lady groups)

Megan Fox , Megan Fox, Megan Fox

Did I ever think I would write a blog post in defense of Megan Fox?

Nope.

But the interwebs are full of a special kind of misogyny today. Thanks to Asylum, AOL's men's lifestyle site - yeah I didn't know they were still around either, or that they needed to expand into "men's lifestyle" - August 4th has been declared A Day Without Megan Fox.

That's right, the very same dudes (and some ladies) that couldn't get enough of her are now saying they have given too many pixels to her. Even Reuters has gotten in on the act. But don't think for a second that they have had an epiphany about media overexposure, exploitation, voyeurism or the invasion of privacy. Nope, they just want to make sure they don't exhaust their page views too soon, "Sure she’s one of the sexiest young female actors, but in order to preserve both her sexiness and her freshness, we need to tone down the over foxposure."

So don't worry. Images of Fox will continue to grace the computer screens, but in the meantime these sites are suggesting nominees for "the next Megan Fox." It is so nice of them to point out how contrived and constructed celebrity is. According to these bastions of intelligent thought, Megan Fox is the poor man's Angelia Jolie and Odette Yustman is the poor man's Megan Fox. So, I get it. Women cannot be just themselves - or even a whole person - unless they are Angelina Jolie. Unfortunately, I'll venture to guess it is not her work with the UN, but rather her embodiment of a video game character, that provides her personhood.

But, does the timing of this "media blackout" seem a bit suspicious to anyone else? It comes on the heels of Fox identifying herself as a feminist and the release of the trailer for Jennifer's Body, a movie in which Fox's character literally eats men and excuses by saying she is not killing people "just boys."

While being aware that as a woman in Hollywood you are "You’re merchandised, you’re a product," is not necessarily a feminist understanding, she is very savvy about Hollywood and how she can capitalize on it. But, who knows, maybe hanging out with Diablo Cody more than Michael Bay will foster her feminist awakening.